Pence Reinstated As VP

   After the scandal now known as “Sweetheartgate” that the staff of The Outsider exposed in an earlier post, Mike Pence stepped down from his would-be role of Vice President of the United States. He named Jessie Ventura as a possible successor, but Ventura declined the offer. 

   Trump and Carson had a conference to discuss the issue of their past. At the commencement of the conference, Carson announced: “I am 100 percent sure that we were in a relationship. It’s shocking, I know, given that I’m not a white female.”

   But by the end of the talks, Carson seemed to have changed his mind, “I am 100 percent sure that I had never met Trump in person until we became acquaintances during the 2016 presidential primary campaign. Therefore, we couldn’t have known each other. No questions, please.”

   No other news outlets have reported this as suspicious. But you know that The Outsider always goes the extra mile. If we were Politifact, this would be rated Pants On Fire. 

   Mike Pence has announced that he is happy to officially become the Vice President now that he does not have to worry about the chance of encountering any non-straight individuals.