Plural Form of “Moose” Changed

   After receiving thousands upon thousands of complaints from average citizens who thought that the rules of English should be simplified, Merriam-Webster decided to make some revolutionary changes to simplify American English, which is thought by the majority of foreigners and newcomers to the United States to be overly complex.

   These changes, which included shifting the plural form of moose, from “moose” to meese, seemed very sensible to most Americans because of the pattern implied in the plural form of goose, which is geese. One of those Americans was the public relations representative of the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources. He said, “We work very hard to protect these magnificent creatures, and now we know that they’ve been truly drawn into the global spotlight.”
   The modifications were also prompted by new reports that showed that Mandarin Chinese, Spanish, and Hindi all remained ahead of English in terms of native speakers, total speakers, and popularity. One reason for this is the ever-present complexity of English in all forms. For example, English has over 500 irregular verbs, much higher than comparable languages.